Credit guru Thea Dudley has spent more than 30 years in LBM credit management. Now she's here to answer your credit and collection questions. Got a question for her mailbag? Contact Thea at [email protected]

Dear Thea,
I have a customer with a past due balance, so I liened the home. Then, the homeowner called and said they paid the builder. That same week the builder (our customer) fell off a roof and died. I confirmed his death with his obituary. I have asked the homeowner for a copy of the cashed check (front and back) since our state is not a full-paid balance state. Where do I go from here?
Signed, Conflicted Credit Manager

Dear Conflicted,At the risk of playing to “type” and sounding like a heartless ghoul, it depends. Was the builder a one-man operation, a small company, mid-size? Is the company able or willing to continue on without him?

How you proceed really depends on the company and its situation. If the company is made up of more than a single person, then you need to find out what the plan is moving forward. Who, if anyone, is taking over or are they closing the doors? If they are moving forward it is likely they will need a few weeks to regroup, restructure, and get back to their new normal.

If they are closing up shop, you will need to find out what the wind-down plan is. What is the timeline and what is the plan for paying creditors?

Singular builder? You may be SOL: Straight outta luck. Chances are in that case there may not be too much of an estate to go after. But, you never know until you investigate. That is what probate is for, resolving the debts of the deceased. The size of your debt may also play a role in your company's decision to pursue or not to pursue.

So in all of the above scenarios, this is where the tricky part comes in. If you are too pushy, too aggressive, call too soon (which is dicey, there is no set Miss Manners rule for this situation and none of my issues are ever covered in "The One Minute Manager"), you get viewed and labeled as a vulture: more concerned about getting paid than a human life. If you wait too long, you may miss your window of opportunity to get paid which is your role in the company. It is a fine line between “socially acceptable” and “heartless vampire.”

First step after hearing the news? Go to your sales rep. They will usually have some information that will give you an idea of what is going on in the short term. If the company is staying in business, an extra week or two is not a big deal. If it's closing, send said rep back for additional information from their contact.

This is where it gets really disturbingly hard. If the builder was just one man, reaching out to the widow to find out about payment can be unsettling, making you question your humanity. My rule of thumb is to wait about a week after the memorial or funeral has taken place.

Place your call, offer your condolences, and start in on the hard discussion. Unfortunately, it's part of life and business and there is no other way than to be straightforward and as compassionately blunt as possible. The family doesn't need a lot of small talk from you.

No matter the size of the company it is always heart-wrenching and sad to hear of a life cut short. To quote Jiminy Cricket, this really is the time to let your conscience be your guide.